You Can't Be My Life!

Its our bond that strong
which keeps me close to you..
for not only we are friends
but much more..
And it kills me to not reciprocate
what you feel,even when i do
to leave my love so sore..

But there's a line i need to draw
at my hearts expense...
For years later i won't regret
keeping you away
but i will woe the betrayal
to my friend..

And since you have her
and i have him
What we felt is too late
And i know the affection can't be undone
and neither can our attachment..
But we can spare us the guilt of betrayal
for lifetime my dear friend..!!

In Love With My Best Friend

"You are my best friend and i love you too" she said with teary eyes.
He sat there quietly.
She looked at him and asked "When did it get so complicated? We both were sad right in our own world, dealing with it, helping each other to deal with it. Then from where did these feelings rush in?" she wept.
He took her hand in his and said "We always felt it right. Not that we never spoke about it or we never told each other that we did like each other even before we were best friends".
"Yeah, but its different now. We already have different stories to manage." she said.
"So who said i am expecting anything from you. It just happened. Now will you let go." he said looking into her eyes.
She hugged him.
"Yeah, will it change our friendship?" she asked being in his arms.
"Yes, surely we are not friends anymore. But again lets not define it. Let it be our sweet little secret. Can you make this work? he said still hugging her.
"Yes, i will try. Our own small love story." she said.
"Will you let IT go now?" he asked for the second time.
"Hmm. Will you let ME go? she asked him in a tone so silent.
He looked deep in her eyes, paused a moment and said "Friend, i never will!!"

Haiku 3

I believe not because i fear you

but i have been in dreadful situations

and yet come out with a pure heart!

A Conversation 3

"Hey honey" he called out loud.
"honey? seriously that's what you gonna call me?" i asked.
"You are a big unhappy box, i can't think of any more names. Wait! How about 'cry baby'. I mean you have to cry on everything.  He mocked me.
I gave him the ugliest angriest look.
"How about Frown the Clown?" he asked.
"I sware to God one more name you come up with, i will i will kick you where it will hurt you the most" i said.
"Ohhh, well you won't have any kids then" he said.
"Kids? who said i will marry you. I have better things to do." was my reply.
"Hmm okay then. I thought its time to tell at our places but since you don't have marriage on your mind,leave it " he said.
That instant i had my eyes filled with tears.
"Seriously, you are gonna cry on this also" he laughed.
"Shut up" i said "Just tell me how are we gonna do it?"

 

Screw Ups

I wish i knew love as much as i claim to know it. I wish i knew exactly i want, whether i want you in my life, i don't want you in my life or i just wanna stay friends cause you are driving me crazy.  Its a simple complication with a simple solution and i don't get the fact that why are we complicating it to the ends. All i want is you to let me know you want me in your life and i will stay. But then why is it that you say if you find someone better than me 'leave'. If i had to leave i could have done that ages back but am hanging around for you to say 'please don't go' and you aren't. I don't want a perfect relationship. I love screw ups. I love you. What am i suppose to do? I can't leave cause i know you will realize 'its us together,always' someday on your convenience and i don't want to be gone. Its destiny for us to be together. I know it and i am waiting for you to know it.

haiku 2

I dance with you

for the joy you bring..

stay with me; my friends..!

Haiku..

I don't blame you..

it was my heart..

only if i wasn't so careless..

Tears, Not This Time!

This time i am not sorry

this time i don't want to look back on you
so well i know i don't value
and that well i don't want you to matter.

I haven't cried this time
and not a inch of grief i gripped.
I stand on the edge of hatred
holding back just one step.

Walked away enough
to uncover the truth love held.
The joy with no tags of your name
is silently making me blithe.

If i cross that one step
your existence gets wiped to eternity
and i keep my feet in,
to not awe our love
but to remind me of 
my flawed illusion...

You Bring Me To Peace!

I glanced at the sea
its a bliss, its a way to my inner peace
i could sit and stare at it
for moments long
see the sun drown
and the moon rise till the stars
be in numbers i can't count...

I wonder what makes you this mighty
the fierce waves
the depth of your soul
the burden you can keep inside
or the mortals who dwell on your essence...

I wet my feet 
and embrace you from long
cause i fear the closer i get to you
the more i will fall in love;
never to return and breathe..

From Love To Arrange: Part 2

She called up her few good friends to ask them what she should do and all held the same opinion "Better don't tell". She thought deep right from the day she got ready for this arrange marriage drama. Obviously it was better never to tell him. But somehow the decision couldn't settle,she pondered long enough. It must be their second or third meeting. She barely knew him, how open were his thoughts, how would he react if she told him the truth. In the end she convinced to shush her 'honest' self and to accept the easier way out of this.
                      They were sitting at this famous coffee place by a huge window where they could see everyone passing bye. With a few coffee sips and the nervous greetings they started their conversation. It went on from favorite movies to books to each others likes and dislikes. They shared their funny college incidents,the curriculum, the big small events that were a part of their life. After a moment of silence he asked "Ever been in a relationship?" and she froze.
            Arrange marriages are hard. You have to choose between people on the basis of few conversations having absolutely no idea exactly how much info to share, and what the other person might despise.
             "You didn't answer me" he nudged her. She thought of what her friends said "Better don't tell" but then she replied "Yes, four years". "What about it then?" he asked. "I don't know. It just didn't happen. Things were awfully different" she blurted out. Scared that she spoke too much she looked away. He smiled at her. "Relax" he spoke in a deep calm voice. "I just wanted to see if you could be honest enough. We all have our packages, don't we?. I am just glad you were brave enough. It ain't a big deal."
               She smiled back confused whether to feel proud that she could be honest to him or that he could be understanding enough to accept what is a big deal to hundred others.