My Encouragement!!

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Falling in Love All Over Again.

I saw her with a smile so mesmerizing and pure. She said "I am happy. He is perfect." It was her mehndi and i was her best friend. So obviously i had to be around. We were friends for almost ten years now and in this span our friendship had undergone a lots of ups and downs. There were time when we didn't speak for months but then there were times when no matter what differences we had, we always landed up comforting each other in our own downs.
               I was seeing her as a bride today, a beautiful happy bride. It was an arrange marriage. Arrange! this word scares the hell out of me. We both had a screw up relationship almost at the same time. Both our partners had bailed out of fear of commitment and later it all fell apart. And yet today i saw her this happy, recovered and healed. I was confused. May be my bruises were yet too fresh, unhealed and hurting. So making sure no one was around i asked her "How does this feel?" She smiled and said "Worth every tear i shed." "Am scared to take this leap" I said to her. "Its alright" I know this situation she said "But dear you will find someone so great that you will be forced to fall in Love all over again".
               My mind instantly had countless thoughts. That was me always thinking. I didn't know how to take that leap of faith. I knew I had been badly bruised to trust anyone anymore . If a person i had known for half a decade could so easily walk out on me I couldn't understand how would i expect a person i met a few months back to stay forever. And i pushed myself through a series of torturous thoughts. Does a forever exist? Can love still be unconditional? Even if it can be, Can I still find a person who can sweep me over my feet and win over a broken heart who has lost so much of faith in magical love stories?
               I have lost too much i thought. I have lost hope, belief and faith on the saying 'Someone out there is made just for you'. Because when it comes to relationships people manipulate, condition it and apply rules. May be I have become too skeptical, too practical and too emotionally unavailable i thought. I looked at her so back in love again. I was genuinely happy for her and in a way proud too . It takes a lot of efforts to feel this all over again or may be she found her perfect guy who made it all so easy for her. I laughed at myself for being so naive, for being so me. I am too messed up i thought and i said to myself  'Good luck to the guy who tries to lure this heart back into believing Love can exist unconditionally'.




6 comments:

  1. It was thoughtful, though seemed a bit cynical.
    Life gives you a second chance to love, to rejoice, to live, one time more! :)

    Cheers
    Animesh
    http://penningdownthemind.blogspot.in/

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  2. Its a mental state .. people cannot be replaced as who they were..affection is such .. however .. life moves on .. a similar affection may surely develop for the one who is less known .. less reasons to be trusted :)
    Nicely expressed

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  3. thoughtful.
    pains of past relationships always scare us into believing anybody again.
    but then, that is what life is all about, moving on, leaving the past behind :)

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